I’d rather enjoy a calm evening sitting on the porch, wrapped in a wool blanket, watching the sun go down, near the ocean, instead of having someone bother me about my problems.
I wish I could find someone to share the porch swing with.
Today, Memorial Day, I went on a day hike in the light to moderately heavy rain which poured down on my bare shoulders as I walked the trail. We got to the top and the rain stopped. Despite the rain, there were several other hikers and even some rock climbers.
On my way home in my friend’s car, a lady in the front seat was sleeping with the seat up, so I crossed my legs and laid her seat back so she could be more relaxed. Later in the hour drive, she moved her head from laying on the left side of her face to trying to hold it face up, but her head kept loosing the strength. I logically thought she needed a head rest, so I anchored my left hand to the seat and cupped her head, mostly hair and the top of her left ear. Still asleep, a slight smile spread across her face and after a few seconds, disappeared as quickly as it had arrived. She relaxed her neck muscles and I felt the combined heat between my palm and her head.
After a while, I gazed off into the rain clouds and the downpour of heavy rain, while praying for our safety on the flooded road top and for visibility. I forgot about my hand’s position except to re-adjust it every time I felt it slipping or a bump in the road which would have made her head rock back and forth, which I would alter the direction of the thrust to reduce the rocking motion of the “head rest.”
I wasn’t counting. We must have traveled for thirty minutes before arriving at our final destination.
Within the last three months I’ve had a lot of sad feelings. Not from depression, but from loneliness. An idea struck me today, while I was being bothered with it.
pray for your future wife
I thought that’s really odd, but there’s nothing bad about praying so I gave it a try. Weird, the loneliness feeling left me so quickly.
Was it, in the end, that I was praying for my own self rather indirectly….
3 February 2003 – Literature Based Research
Thou art one of many flowers in the field.
Thou shinest with immense beauty
and art a dove among many pigeons.
I wouldst give my heart and life
to lie beside you in the vast valley of roses.
To serve you with devout passion
and grace your body with the many
colors of pedals from the roses of the valley.
I wouldst be proud to be thou husband and friend.